Omelets

I made myself an omelet for dinner last night. IT was fantastic!! Eggs, salsa, and pepper-jack cheese. The following picture is not mine, but my omelet was just as fantastic looking and probably better tasting.

Omelets fascinate me. There used to (quite possibly still is) an omelet shop in Chicago that my friends and I used to go to ALL the time, ever time we went up there. I would always get the spinach and feta omelet. They then would bring me out this heaping plate of warm, smelly goodness. The eggs were like clouds. *drools* I then made it my mission to make AWESOME omelets for anyone who wants one. So omelets are probably about the only thing that I absolutely rock at making.

OK, so thinking of spinach and feta reminds me of the spinach and feta calzone I used to get at One World in Peoria before the douche bags changed over to making pizzas. I would get a spinach, feta, and walnut calzone with raspberry vinaigrette. Hold on while I go find a picture to drool all over.

Yes, I am aware that this calzone has a cup of not raspberry vinaigrette, but just use your imagination.

GREATEST. LOL. EVER!!

It's been a while.....who cares....STFU

Lets see, since I last updated, apparently nothing has happened. Not entirely true. I have been to Florida for a week and back, hung out with my mom under a tent and drank LOTS of beer, and saw tons of people I used to hang with in high school under that same tent. This tent would be the beer tent at Brimfield Old Settlers Days. That saturday was NUTZ.

Pic I have been holding out to put online.


Which brings me talk about my moms friend. I'll call her Hippie. Well Hippie is a fuckin Hippie, with her clove cigarette smokin ass. I don't know why I have an issue with hippies, but I do. I try not too, but I can't help myself. I don't dislike all hippie-minded people, I just don't care for real hippies, who smell like patchouli and travel around smokin dope and looking like bums. Anyway, I digress. Hippie was hangin under the beer tent, smokin her cloves, and spinnin to the bunk ass country music playing. I think she kept trying to make out with my mom. Which if my mom wants to get her swerve on with a chick, I don't care, but please don't let it be the fuckin hippie!!

Ok, I am done with the Hippie.

My own fuck family circus..

I loved the fuck family circus section on howtokillpeople.com, so I decided to make my own. I only have one done now, but I will make some more later.

Last night...

Last night I watched a short video named "Hung", the summary is "Five lesbians, a magic potion, something they never expected from sunrise to sunset...." So the movie shows what they would do for a day if they had a penis. I know what I would do!!! No Man, Woman, or Plant would be safe.

I was telling my co-workers about the short and my thoughts. To which I get these kinda replies.

Q: How do you know Michelle with a penis has been in your house?
A: All the combos are gone and the cats are pregnant!!

I almost died laughing so hard.

Then the same person makes this for me:


Here is a youtube I uploaded of the short.

Funny as shit..

Not that shit is funny. I have been in a blog funk lately. Haven't really found anything that floats my boat. Till today...
Here are my favorite ones.

Suxor..

I have an ear infection. Both Inner and Outer Ear. For the past week I have wanted to stab my ear drum outta my left ear, I think it would have felt better. I used to get ear infections all the time in my right ear, which has caused a lack of hearing ability out of it, so my left ear has been my good ear. So needless to say I have been walking around pretty much deaf and grumpy with my face swollen out all weird looking.

Common signs to look for are:

• unusual irritability


• difficulty sleeping


• tugging or pulling at one or both ears


• fever


• fluid draining from the ear


• loss of balance


• unresponsiveness to quiet sounds or other signs of hearing difficulty such as sitting too close to the television or being inattentive

I don't even feel like gis'in or quotin anything.........